A Blog Reader’s Desire for More Emotion

  A Brainy Heart
  Originally uploaded by PsicoCafé.

I love ideas. I love reading about ideas, talking to people about ideas, and generally thinking hard about interesting issues.

I also love meeting blog readers in-person. It’s a fascinating interaction to meet someone in-person who’s been reading my blog — they have all sorts of ideas about what I’ll be like. Sometimes reality is consistent with expectations, sometimes not.

I recently met a reader with whom I’d had some electronic communication and a brief phone call. We’d also been reading each other’s blog for a year or so. She came into our breakfast meeting with a single goal: No intellectual banter. She wanted to know the "real Ben". She wanted to know the emotional Ben. She wanted to pull back the curtain.

It reminded me of my June ’06 post and long comment discussion titled, "Where are the references to the non-professional emotional events in my life?"

I’m not sure there’s really a curtain to pull back, but I’ll certainly try to blog more about "soft stuff". Any other feedback is welcome!

11 comments on “A Blog Reader’s Desire for More Emotion
  • I am always amused by people wanting to know other people in a non-professional context.

    Unlike business relationships, where the mutual value can be defined and negotiated, one cannot negotiate one’s way into a friendship with anyone.

    Ironically but not surprisingly we show more of our hands in a business negotiation than in a budding friendship or social relationship. Why?

    Well, sometimes mystery is the way to go in relationships, as long-married couples will tell you. Something new still remaining to discover in a person with whom one is fascinated contributes immensely to an enduring relationship.

  • I think that your friend Tim Taylor’s blog would be a reasonable approximation of what some blog readers feel is missing. Your blog is always upbeat and thought-provoking, but it rarely discusses your fears and vulnerabilities. Surely you have some? There is also a conspicuous lack of drooling over cute girls which must surely baffle some readers!

    Btw, just went to Mongolia! GREAT place. The city sucks and is like China but the countryside is fantastic hiking and you should go at least once in your life.

  • “There is also a conspicuous lack of drooling over cute girls which must surely baffle some readers!”

    Lawd. Promise me Ben that you will not turn this blog into an emotion drenched account of what it feels like to live the life of a 19 year old who has obtained a measure of success beyond what most people achieve in their life spliced in with the pressures of being late-teen.

    Read a total of two blogs. Yours, and another personal friend of mine(alanwu.org) who actually referred me to your blog.

    Your blog is like a product among a million other blogs. What sets you apart from all the other blogs is what you have done for your age. You dont need the future addition of emotion to create further value to the readers, that’s already been done. Ben Casnocha doesn’t have to be everything to everyone. If I wanted to read about teenage emotions (I dont mean in a negative way) I’d go myspace.

    I want to read about your psychology, your path, your influences, and principles you used to achieve your success. I also find what is interesting for you is interesting to me.

  • I guess it all depends on what Ben wants. There are certainly readers who read because they find his life story inspiring and share his intellectual interests, but there are also readers who want to know his personal side. Personally, I find the current rendition a little bit artificial because of its emphasis on the intellectual over the emotional, but it is infinitely preferable to MySpace.

  • No mistaking, it’s definitely up to Ben.

    The way I see it, I see people being split between being emotionally centred and not; neither being better than the other. But I think if Ben was one of those people that was very emotionally centred that it would have already come out in his blog.

    I guess I am more outcomes focused when it comes to this blog (sorry to speak in such artificial terms). At a minimum coming to Ben’s blog sets my benchmark of what is possible a little higher than what it would have been. And, meaning this in the nicest possible way, but the internal emotional state of Ben is really none of my business, or my concern.

    As you said, it’s up to Ben.

  • All this talk about emotions. Why don’t you people just say it?

    ‘Sex’. There.

    Frankly, when it comes to sex, I prefer the ‘hard’ stuff.

    I would hope that anything to be seen when the curtain is pulled back would be X-rated.

  • polonius was right, to thine own self be true. — It’s your blog, write whatever the fuck you wanna write and let everything else take care of itself. Don’t censor yourself unduly, but also don’t put stuff out into a public realm that you’re not interested in sharing with the world. I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog so far – keep up the good work and best of luck.

  • One thing that I’ve found helpful Ben is that when I’m writing about the stuff I share at times I won’t take a position just share.

    It’s kind of hard at first actually, because it means that the post won’t have a clear cut end.

    I think a wonderful topic for you to share about might be, for example, if you have any fears about letting anyone down (excluding yourself….that’s a little too easy).

    You’re off to a strong start just sharing what you already have.

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