Airline Safety

The safety record of Russian and Ukrainian airlines is terrible.

The planes themselves are also terrible. Ex bombers, seats don’t work, light overhead looks 20+ years old.

You say your prayer on the way up and on the way down.

3 Responses to Airline Safety

  1. John William says:

    Actually – flying Aeroflot ( particularly its subsidiaries ) is recommended by all stand up comics looking for new material.
    For instance – I flew Aeroflot from Frankfurt to Samara, Russia and it was supurb. Picture the scene – your fellow russian passengers all dressed in various shades of black or grey dark suits accompainied by corpulent babushkas clutching their plastic bags from a mega shopping trip in Germany. You are greeted on the plane by Aeroflot stewadesses who look like burly russian Olympic shot putters.
    Before take off and while the planes reving up – the babushkas are kneeling in prayer by their seats – praying for a safe journey.
    The plane – as you know are 2 decades old and built like Soviet air force bombers, so you enjoy all the bumps & vibrations as the plane strains to take off.
    The seatbelts being old and well worn are either too tight or too loose – so you never feel comfortable wearing them.
    In flight refreshments are provided by your fellow passengers who will ply you with vodka – they somehow managed to smuggle on board.
    Landing is just as exciting as takeoff and guarenteed to give you laugh – particularly if your landing in bad weather as the plane sways from side to side as wind turbulence rocks the aircraft – touch down is with a jolt and out flies a cockereral that one of the babushkas had hidden in her bag – feathers flying everywhere and best of all – all the headrests on the unoccupied seats collapse like a pack of playing cards.
    Laughter and applause come from the russian passengers as the babushkas breath a sigh of relief as the aircraft lands and taxis to the airport terminal.

  2. Moyna says:

    Well written article.

  3. Anton says:

    I have flown to Samara as well as to many other russsian cities from either western european cities
    or from other russian airports. Although I generally agree with you with the lack of safety on russian aeroplanes, i have never seen babushkas with hens and so on (certainly not from a flight out of Frankfurt).
    The habit of praying before a flight is something which is done
    prior to start any journeys whether by car, bus, aeroplane or even by foot (if it is a long slog).
    Do not characterise people the way you do as you do show a lot of ignorance of habits.
    Laughing and the applause bit happens also when western aeroplanes land, so it is not restricted
    to Russian aeroplanes only. I could tell you many stories when travelling on flights originating from
    Western european cities or USA airports too. You seem to forget that all world is just a village.
    I am not Eastern European.

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